Sometimes I can't breathe, my heart hurts. I feel so alone in a room full of friends. I rather not share my thoughts for the simple fact I don't want to bother them. I bottle it up and put it in the furthest part of my mind.
When I sing most times it's because the lyrics, the melody, the tone fits my exact mood or brings me back to a memory I can't seem to escape from.
Somewhere in the process of life I lost myself. I was so content on helping people and "being there" that I forgot what I deserve. Love.
I admit I look for love in all the wrong places, I do. When it comes to love of a man I'm confused. Where the fuck
was the man in my life? To teach me "baby girl don't let these boys fill your head up!" or to come to the door when I'm sitting on the step with my "friend" and tell me it's time to come in? I wanted that. It may sound dumb to the person that has/had it, but to me I wanted a father.
"You can't blame someone else for your mistakes" I don't but he's part of the reason.
My problems are stupid, they are. I know there are people whose problems are worse then what I'm going through, therefore I keep it to myself. It's just that sometimes my small stupid problems are eating me alive. I'm sorry because I just feel like this is a waste of time. I'm just tired of nothing and tired of it by myself. -Maya Lassiter
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